The Rational Fool: March 2009

spotlight

Whichcraft?

Until President Obama made his faux pas on the Special Olympics while appearing on the Jay Leno show, Pope Benedict was merrily riding the media waves. On his mission to the African continent, presumably to rescue the misguided pagans from hell and grant them salvation, Benedict first poo-pooed the effectiveness of condoms in preventing sexually transmitted diseases, in particular, HIV/AIDS. His cure? The Bible, of course. Embrace the bible and follow its commands, and the world will be rid of these scourges and more. As a bonus, he did not say, we will be rid of promiscuity and sex for pleasure, too!

If Pope Benedict had stopped with that, I would have dismissed his words as those of a delusional old man living in the Garden of Eden, but he did not. He went on to berate the men and women of Africa for believing in witchcraft as a cure all, and extolled the virtues of listening to the evangelists, and converting to Christianity. I suppose Pope Benedict has been deprived of watching enlightening TV shows, where Christian evangelists routinely perform medical miracles. Oops, that's not witchcraft, though. It's called faith healing!

In case these TV miracles fail to impress the Pope in his war on witchcraft, he should watch this YouTube video, where Thomas Muthee, the vanquisher of the evil witch Mama Jane, anointing Mayor Sarah Palin against witchcraft, so she could be free to lead the Alaskan faithful, and eventually the entire Christian America, out of the financial ground zero, and into the kingdom of heaven!

What did you say we must reject, Pope Benedict? Whichcraft was it?

humor

Top Ten Sexialism Quotes

10: Sexialism is reproduction organized on the basis of common ownership by the nation of all means of reproduction.
9: Sex appears at first sight an extremely obvious, trivial thing. But its analysis brings out that it is a very strange thing, abounding in metaphysical subtleties and theological niceties.
8: Sex is money, sex is commodity. By virtue of it being value, it has acquired the occult ability to add value to itself. It brings forth living offspring, or, at the least, lays miscarried eggs.
7: The history of all societies has been the history of sexual struggles.
6: Prowess flows from the barrel of the gun.
5: Sex is the opium of the teens.
4: The theory of Sexialism may be summed up in one sentence: abolish all private parts.
3: From each according to his ability, and to each according to her need.
2: Sexial progress can be measured by the sexual position of the female sex.
1: Virgins of the world, copulate; you have nothing to lose but your hymens.

Inspired by the title of the book by Martha Nussbaum, Sex and Social Justice. All quotes are paraphrases of those by Karl Marx and Mao Zedong.

spotlight

Learning to Live With Islam

The veil is not the same as the suicide belt. We can better pursue our values if we recognize the local and cultural context, and appreciate that people want to find their own balance between freedom and order, liberty and license.
--- Fareed Zakaria. Learning to Live With Radical Islam. Newsweek: February 28, 2009.

Sharia demands death for the adulteress
I am not an adulteress
I can learn to live with Sharia.

Sharia demands death for the gays
I am not a gay
I can learn to live with Sharia.

Sharia demands death for the blasphemer
I am not a blasphemer
I can learn to live with Sharia.

Sharia demands death for the apostate
I am not a Muslim
I can learn to live with Sharia.

Islam demands Sharia for everyone
I am no one
I learned to live with Islam.

An adaptation of "First they came...", a poem attributed to Pastor Martin Niemöller (1892–1984).

humor

Religulous Offers

A bit of Onion to my heart... er... to my stomach:

"Obviously, I bring a lot to the table," Pritchard said. "I'm a broken shell of a man with nowhere else to turn and I will believe just about anything at this point, so if a religion really wants me, they're going to have to sweeten the pot. For instance, Hinduism is promising me rebirth as a king and the unlocking of all the secrets of the universe. But at this stage, that's not enough. How about throwing in some final redemption, or a car, or complete and total spiritual transcendence?"

"You're going to have to do better than eternal life," Pritchard added. "Everyone's offering that."

Pritchard has been showered with gifts as the religious institutions attempt to curry favor and sway his decision. He has received a free Book Of Mormon from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a 2008 wall calendar from the Christians, and was even visited at his home by two representatives from the Jehovah's Witnesses, which Pritchard said was flattering, but "came off as a little too desperate."

"The Catholic Church has been wining and dining me," said Pritchard, who was personally invited to attend a spaghetti supper at a local rectory last Tuesday. "If I'm getting free Italian dinners today, just think what they'll give me when I tell them that Islam is promising me lofty mansions, lush gardens, and 4,000 virgin companions in the afterlife. I'll be eating like a king!"

Onion, as they say, must be taken with a pinch of salt ;)

Hat tip: link from divs via email. The title, of course, is credited to Bill Maher's documentary, Religulous

opinion

God's Law

Hm, when did I last blog about these so-called laws of gods, reigning supreme over the affairs of the humans? This time it's in Brazil, which is predominantly Catholic. Abortion, it follows, is illegal in that country, except in cases of rape or endangerment to the mother's life.

Maria (not her real name) is only 9 years old, and barely weighs 75 lbs (36 kg). She was raped by her stepfather, not once, but routinely since she was 6. Only, in the latest incident Maria got pregnant with twins. Her stepfather has confessed to the rape, and has been arrested. If convicted of the crime, I suppose he will be given the appropriate punishment under Brazil's penal code.

Maria's doctors deemed her uterus to be too small to carry even one fetus to full term, leave alone twins, without risking her life. Abortion, they decided, was within the bounds of the law:

"She is very small. Her uterus doesn't have the ability to hold one, let alone two children," [the director of the hospital where the abortion was performed, Fatima] Maia said.

Not so fast, declared the Church. Its lawyers wanted Maria to carry ~~the babies~~ to full term, and if necessary, have a Caesarean section. Fortunately for her, the Brazilian court sided with Maria.

The Church, however, remained defiant:

"The law of God is above any human law," Jose Cardoso Sobrinho, the archbishop of Olinda and Recife, said on newspaper O Globo's website.

Maria's mother, and her doctors who performed the abortion, were excommunicated from Catholicism.

I haven't heard anything from the archbishop about what his god's law said about the rapist. Would he prefer a personal confession from the rapist to whitewash his sin? Or, would he rather wait till the pedophile reached the gates of St.Peter at the ripe old age of 80, after he had fathered a few dozen great grand daughters? Perhaps, justice must wait even longer. For, wasn't it the same god who called for four or more male witnesses for the rape?

Make no mistake about it, I fully respect the Catholic Church's prerogative to excommunicate those who are involved in this ~~heinous crime~~ to save Maria. In fact, I strongly recommend that they do so. I recommend that they excommunicate every Catholic who engages in sex for pleasure, and not for reproduction. I beseech them to excommunicate every woman who takes a pill, every boy and every girl who engages in premarital sex, and every gay and lesbian couple. And, please, please excommunicate every accomplice to these sins.

Rest not until there is no Catholic left on this planet to excommunicate! Thank you.